Why Standard Visitation Should NOT Be Standard


When a nuclear family separates, it usually separates into a "custodial" family and a "non-custodial" family. The custodial family is the parent with whom the children reside on a day-to-day basis. Most often, it's the Mother. The non-custodial family is the other parent - usually Dad - and the children when they are with him.

Dad usually gets "visitation" with his children. Some states refer to it as "parenting time," recognizing that he maintains his status as parent, but still distinguishing that his time with his children is regulated. For families which - prior to the separation - had Dad in the home, seeing the children every day, interacting with the kids on a regular basis, probably the single most traumatic event is when the kids realize that they won't see Dad every day. The single most on-going trauma occurs to kids when the visitation schedule is interfered with by Mom.

Now, this does not occur in every case, but it happens often enough. "Standard" visitation is alternating weekends and one evening per week. This is imposed because Moms, courts, and experts put forth that more frequent visitation is "disruptive" to the children and that kids should not be "bounced back and forth."

For kids that have gone from seeing Dad 30 times a month to 8 times a month, there IS nothing more disruptive! For kids that have gone from learning from, and being loved on a daily basis, by TWO parents to the sole CONTROL of one parent, there is NO bouncing that is more disruptive. If Dad is denied ONE weekend, his time with his children is reduced by 25%. Somehow, THAT disruption is never considered. Also never considered is the REAL disruption that occurs on the "one night per week": kids get bundled up, travel with Dad, get unbundled, eat dinner, maybe do homework, get bundled up again, travel back, get unbundled at Mom's house, and get ready for bed. Doesn't it make more sense to stay OVERNIGHT with Dad on this visit?

Where the children had Dad in the house on a daily basis, Courts need to consider schedules that provide the kids with more regular visit - daily after school, or every other day, or more mid-week overnight visitations. Kids who do not see their father are more likely to be abused by a boyfriend or step-father, abuse drugs,or engage in criminal activity. Frequent visitation may be one way to stem this terrible tide. http://onestop.easystorecreator.net

Erik Carter is an experienced family law litigator. He has created a website to help non-custodial fathers at http://onestop.easystorecreator.net He has also written two books: "Aggressive Pleadings For The Non-Custodial Father" http://dadspleadings.easystorecreator.net and "Six Temptations Of Jesus Christ" http://www.knowledge-download.com/Six_Temptations







Related News



Brinkley split is newest image-crushing NY divorce - The Associated Press

The Associated Press

Brinkley split is newest image-crushing NY divorce
The Associated Press -Jul 4, 2008
NEW YORK (AP) — When the media capital of the world meets a celebrity divorce, it's a breakup made in tabloid heaven. So the city that has hosted the ...

Shelley Craft puts on brave face after divorce - Melbourne Herald Sun

Shelley Craft puts on brave face after divorce
Melbourne Herald Sun, Australia -8 hours ago
SHELLEY Craft is enjoying a ratings bonanza hosting two of Channel Nine's best-loved shows but behind her infectious smile has been a year of misery and ...

Peter Cook-Christie Brinkley Divorce Trial Continues - Enews 2.0

Enews 2.0

Peter Cook-Christie Brinkley Divorce Trial Continues
Enews 2.0, UK -48 minutes ago
... on the 4th of July surrounded by family and friends and enjoyed a midday lunch in an attempt to forget the ugly divorce from forth husband Peter Cook. ...
Video: Brinkley's Divorce Starts UglyCBS
Christie Brinkley’s divorce gets dirtySheKnows.com
Brinkley Divorce Trial Heats UpCinema Blend
eFluxMedia - The Spoof (satire)
all 65 news articles

Rodriguez's wife reportedly filing for divorce on Monday - ESPN

ESPN

Rodriguez's wife reportedly filing for divorce on Monday
ESPN -10 hours ago
The wife of New York Yankees third baseman Alex Rodriguez will file for divorce in Miami-Dade Circuit Court on Monday, the Miami Herald reported on Sunday. ...
Report: A-Rod's Wife To File For DivorceCBS 4
Report: Wife of NY Yankees' Rodriguez to file for divorcePoughkeepsie Journal
THE TICKER Media: A-Rod's wife to call it quitsDetroit Free Press
all 10 news articles

I won't divorce Guy: Madonna - NDTV.com

WELT ONLINE

I won't divorce Guy: Madonna
NDTV.com, India -3 hours ago
Refuting rumours that her marriage with Guy Ritchie is on the rocks, pop diva Madonna has denied that she plans to divorce her husband. ...
Madonna denies affair, divorce rumours, spiritual outreachAFP
Alex Rodriguez's wife Cynthia seeks divorceXinhua
A-Rod's Wife Filing for Divorce, Lawyer SaysABC News
E! Online - In Entertainment
all 2,419 news articles


Actor John Cleese faces long and costly divorce, says Michael Winner - Telegraph.co.uk

Contactmusic.com

Actor John Cleese faces long and costly divorce, says Michael Winner
Telegraph.co.uk, United Kingdom -11 hours ago
The film director and food critic said Cleese, 69, and his third wife faced a long and costly divorce, which could see him lose his apartment in New York ...
John Cleese Could Lose Property In Divorce BattleShowbiz Spy
all 5 news articles

LAWS of EVE - Remarried before divorce was final - Jamaica Gleaner

Jamaica Gleaner

LAWS of EVE - Remarried before divorce was final
Jamaica Gleaner, Jamaica -3 hours ago
The divorce process remains incomplete unless the decree absolute is granted. The decree absolute is not automatically granted six weeks after the decree ...

Pros: Porn's not at fault for Christie Brinkley divorce - New York Daily News

New York Daily News

Pros: Porn's not at fault for Christie Brinkley divorce
New York Daily News, NY -1 hour ago
As Peter Cook's failed marriage to supermodel Christie Brinkley is put under a microscope, Brinkley's lawyers are quick to say his fondness for pornography ...
Christie Brinkley case raises the question: Are you cyber cheating?New York Daily News
all 2 news articles

Former supermodel Christie Brinkley's grubby divorce details - Melbourne Herald Sun

ABC News

Former supermodel Christie Brinkley's grubby divorce details
Melbourne Herald Sun, Australia -Jul 5, 2008
... but you have to ask whether celebrities such as Brinkley consider how their children will be affected before telling all in such bitter divorce cases. ...
Video: Brinkley's Divorce Starts UglyCBS
Explosive, Lurid Allegations in Nasty Brinkley-Cook DivorceFOXNews
"Shattered" Brinkley Takes Stand in Divorce TrialE! Online
The Age - Village Voice
all 1,445 news articles

Reports: A-Rod's wife to file for divorce - The Associated Press

The Associated Press

Reports: A-Rod's wife to file for divorce
The Associated Press -10 hours ago
MIAMI (AP) — Alex Rodriguez's wife will file for divorce Monday, according to media reports. Cynthia Rodriguez, who married the New York Yankees star in ...